Tuesday, November 18, 2008

Pistol Whipped

I recently watched a movie called Pistol Whipped - now any movie with that kind of a title shouldn't even get pass through the "logic" department. It did so here I am talking about it.
When I was younger (like 20 years ago), I always found Steen Seagal cool coz of his long pony tail and his Akido fighting skills. Dude could break bones - literally break bones! That's was cool. But over the years, when you grow up, you realise that all his moves are pretty stupid and that he really CANNOT act for shit.
Don't bother watching this movie even if it's for pleasure sake - I made that mistake. Here's what the movie's about in a nutshell. Matt Conner (Steven Seagal) is an ex-cop whose life has gone downhill since he was kicked off the Bridgeport police force after being accused of corruption. Every so often Matt goes to a catholic church to talk to Father Joe Maloney, who is a friend of his. Matt's been struggling with a debilitating gambling problem and a debt that totals more than $1,000,000.
Matt is approached by a man named Blue, who takes Matt to meet with a mysterious old man. The Old Man informs Matt that he has bought out all of Matt's gambling debt markers. The Old Man offers to wipe Matt's debt clean in exchange for a few "favors." All Matt has to do is hunt down and kill the city's biggest gangsters, those that the police can't touch. Matt thinks something isn't right, and with the help of his ex-wife Liz's husband, police Lt. Steve Shacter, Matt begins to investigate Blue while fighting his alcoholism, getting visits from Becky, and doing the first two jobs -- taking out major local gangsters Bruno and Ling.
Complicating matters is a shifty alliance with the Old Man, Blue, and their associate, Andrea "Drea" Smalls, whom Matt sleeps with. And then the Old Man gives Matt his next assignment -- to kill Steve. It turns out that Steve is the leader of a group of corrupt cops who had been working with Bruno and Ling. It was Steve who stole the money that Matt was accused of stealing, and then Steve killed Matt's partner before Matt was thrown off the force. Now, Steve goes to the church and brutally kills Father Maloney, and Matt vows to kill the man who killed Father Maloney. Matt figures out that it was Steve. Steve kidnaps Becky, and Matt puts his life on the line to rescue her
Overall, boring and stupid. Doesn't even make it to a "B" standard of movies. If you still wanna watch it, I'd suggest a comfy pillow, some chips and LOTS of alcohol. But on the other hand, perfect movie during company parties! Ha! ha!

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