Friday, December 11, 2009

Once It's Gone

Human behavior is funny really. We all have made mistakes - me included. But like the saying goes - I'm only human - born to make mistakes - coz that's how we learn to better ourselves.
Have you ever been in a position where, you miss out on the one true thing in your life because you were too busy chasing after something that you thought that was meant to be? I have! And today, as my eyes open up to reality and what life truly means, I've come to realise that the one true thing in my life, was right in front of me but I was too damm busy chasing after a dream / nightmare - whatever it may be - but I wasn't sensitive enough to realise the honesty and sincerity of this person.
I was sitting on my high horse - with an aerial view of what I thought was the perfect life that I was living and leading. I wasn't sensitive enough to those around me. Family - they will always forgive you because that's what blood means - right or wrong, good or bad, they stick by you. I was living a life where I thought those people around me, will always be around no matter what I do - man was I wrong.
I've hurt many - knowing or unknowingly but I've hurt them. I've ignored those that matter. I've wounded those who loved me. I've neglected those who have made me. But just like life, you always get a second chance but not in every aspect.

If you're reading this, know this.

The hurt and the pain will never go away permanently but will always be there as a constant reminder of what I've done and what I should never do. Which on many different levels is a good thing coz now I have something always telling me if I'm being an ass. I've lost you but it doesn't mean you've vanished. It's only fair that I feel the pain that I've caused you only to know how much I've meant to you so that I can appreciate what you had for me.

I take my hats off for you for the things you've put up with. I take my hats off to you for the pain you've managed to successfully cover up and keep a smile on your face. I take my hats off to you for always being there no matter what the situation. Most of all - I take my hats off to you for what you stand for.

May 2010 be a year where wrong become right and bad become good and appreciation growns.

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